How to deal with divorce as an expat

Life as an expat professional can be exciting, challenging and very rewarding in many ways, but things can go badly wrong if family matters aren’t properly looked after.

It’s a proven fact that the divorce rate in the expat community is higher than average and is often due to the pressure of adjusting to a totally different lifestyle. The problems experienced by trailing spouses who’ve left rewarding careers to follow their partners to an unfamiliar location, husbands spending most of their time at work or with new business colleagues and issues with children's’ adjustments to their new lives are all common causes of expat divorce. Many couples seek mediation before they finally separate, but often a split is inevitable.

Divorce overseas often goes by different rules than in the home country, with taking legal advice essential at the start and throughout the process. Many expats aren’t aware that divorces can be filed in more than one country, making legal advice even more essential as to the best way forward. The initial consideration is usually whether to arrange the proceedings using mediation, via lawyers or in a collaborative setting. Another point to consider is the time frame of divorce in the country of residence versus that in the home country. For example, in Germany, Switzerland and the USA, spouses cannot file for divorce until separation has been in place for at least one year.

Many lawyers working with expats suggest the procedure should be seen as a transition from married life as a couple to a life outside marriage. In the case of non-acrimonious divorce, this approach can result in a faster settlement where both parties accept a fair deal, an especially important issue when one or both of the parties are staying overseas. Where there are children, it helps to remember that international family law differs country to country, even in Europe where legislation also includes children born as a result of an international relationship. In other cases, matrimonial law can conflict with succession laws, particularly when real estate is owned in more than one country.

Expat professional divorces where one or both of the parties have been receiving top salaries can be tricky as regards financial complexities, with the best way forward involving contacting an international tax advisor. If mediation isn’t a viable option, a collaborative divorce is the best plan, with each party having their own lawyer to advocate in their individual interests. Where small children are involved, guiding parents towards the best solution by identifying possible problems may need a coach with a background in psychology and experience in guiding parents towards the best solution for all.